I think of all the complexities of life, falling in love is the most mysterious.
I often look around at my home and family and marvel at how I ended up here. Thinking back at the first interactions with my now husband of almost 8 years, I could never have imagined this is where we'd be. I am truly amazed and grateful on a daily basis for how God has blessed me and guided my path. Despite my best efforts to do my own thing and divert my future from where I stand today, God was faithful to bring someone into my life who grounded me in a way I wasn't (I thought) prepared for.
The year I met my man, I was in a very dark place mentally, emotionally, and financially. I had a string of bad dates and relationships that went nowhere. The pressure of bills without a roommate had led me to take a management job to avoid working multiple jobs, which I'd been doing for too long. Once thrown into a position I was barely trained for with no support from staff nor upper management, I knew that my new position was a huge mistake and very negatively affecting me, crushing my spirit a little more every day. I had become the kind of employee I'm intolerant of and didn't recognize myself at work nor in private. So, I chose to up and quit spontaneously. Immediately after, I jumped in my car and drove to my parents' house to spend one of the last opportunities I had for a Christmas with my entire family. From there, I left my apartment and moved back to my parents' home, compelled by my deep depression. I was fully aware how dangerous my depression had become and knew I needed to be surrounded by people who loved me and would keep me accountable. Under all these circumstances, I still somehow found the capacity to fall in love.
Although I had sworn off men and intimate relationships, I was determined to make new friends, start the healing process, and repair my spiritual life one step at a time. My sister had become the door to a new world of friends and social events, and I took the opportunities that came which led to my meeting my husband.
So, today I'm going to share with you the first thoughts I had the day I met my hubby-wubs:
1. The very first thing that struck me was how tall he was. I'm not sure what I was expecting when I went to his house for a dinner "party." I was just initially stunned at how tall he was.
2. His height wasn't the only thing that was bigger than I expected... Hey now, dear readers. Get your minds out of the gutter, I was only referring to his personality! He was so friendly, non-judgmental, hospitable, and such a fresh breath of air. I felt comfortable and relaxed in his presence, which led to great conversation, which led to us finding out how much we agreed on and how compatible we were. Even if I wasn't immediately hearing wedding bells, he was definitely a candidate to become a very, very good friend. I can't overstate how much that helped with my recovery. Hope was reborn in discovering his new friendship.
3. He was exotic to me. He came from a different world both figuratively and literally. He spoke a new language, cooked savory, distinctive food, listened and danced to exciting music. He had such an original perspective on life. I LOVED that. Still do, by the way. ;)
Through all the challenges we've faced separately and together, we were both shaped and stretched into better people. Today when obstacles come, as they often do in life, we choose to take them head on and grow stronger together. This has been our glue in marriage. Bonded we stand, divided we fail. If there is any advice I could leave, it would be: STICK TOGETHER. Fight everything that tries to pull you apart. Life is filled with distractions and tests that will try to keep you apart and drive a division between you and your partner; fight against those things with all of your will. And if you both battle to be united, you will succeed in finding each other and building a stronger union with your spouse and companion.
Now, it's just the two of us against the world!